


Ame (雨)

by MakaS0ul



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, byleth and her lack of emotional knowledge, it gets fluffy afterward, the angst is only in the beginning, trying to move forward
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-03
Updated: 2020-01-03
Packaged: 2021-02-27 09:07:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22094575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MakaS0ul/pseuds/MakaS0ul
Summary: Byleth has avoided the rain since the day Jeralt passed, and she was sure nobody had noticed, until Dorothea Arnault knocks on her door.
Relationships: Dorothea Arnault/My Unit | Byleth
Comments: 4
Kudos: 127





	Ame (雨)

**Author's Note:**

> It's been raining for days where I live and I got the "TFW No GF" mood so I wrote this. Also, I got a new rad mechanical keyboard for Christmas and I wanted to really try it out. Clicky keyboard ASMR lmao. Anyway, enjoy~!

It was raining the day that Byleth was born, and were anyone to see her constant expressionless face, they might say that such gloomy weather was befitting such a gloomy visage. But Byleth didn’t care. To her, rain simply was a condition to be weary of as a mercenary. Too much rain could cause a muddy battlefield, hampering her movement. It could chill someone to the bone and slow them down. It could impair vision if it pelted directly into someone’s face. Yes, like the rest of Byleth’s narrow world, unless it affected her ability to fight, it was something of little consequence.

It was raining on that day, too. That day that Jeralt, her father, breathed his last. It had soaked her to the bone as she held his limp form tight to her, but she hadn’t noticed the chill; too overwhelmed with emotions she had never felt before. The drops mingled with her tears. She only realized she was crying once her father had mentioned so.

After that day, Byleth didn’t like the rain very much.

Rain was far too close to her most painful memory.

So most days it rained, Byleth stayed inside, not even leaving her room for food. It was easier to pretend it didn’t exist if she never saw it.

Nobody seemed to notice her odd behavior, which suited Byleth just fine; the less people that asked, the better. Sorrow was an emotion she wished she was unable to feel, just like all her emotions prior to arriving at Garreg Mach. Out of all the emotions to unlock within herself, why did it have to be the one that hurt so much?

Today, it was raining. Byleth had opened her door that morning to go to breakfast only to be greeted with a downpour. Thus, she promptly shut her door and removed her armor, before sitting upon her bed and wrapping the blankets around her head. Though they were thin sheets, they kept the pitter patter of the rain out fairly well.

Today, just like every day that it rained, she would stay inside and pretend those memories and emotions didn’t exist.

Or so that had been the plan.

Byleth heard a knock at her door followed by a quiet, “Professor? Are you in there?”

For a brief second, she considered not answering, but a part of her felt bad for even considering such a thing. Especially considering the voice belonged to her (secret favorite) student. With a sigh, Byleth pulled the blankets off and opened her door.

“Dorothea? Did you need something?” she asked, her form blocking off sight into the rest of her dark room.

Dorothea smiled brightly, much like she always did, but her eyes took in Byleth’s lack of armor and likely her mussed hair with a scrutiny that would make Hubert jealous. “Actually, Professor, I do, in fact, need something.”

When she said nothing immediately, Byleth quirked a brow. It was unlike Dorothea to be… well, it wasn’t _un_ like her to be coy, but this felt different. It felt as if she was waiting for Byleth to take the bait for… something.

Byleth was in little mood for games, even Dorothea’s games, so she sighed and asked, “What did you need, Dorothea?”

“I’m glad you asked, Professor. You see, a little birdie told me that you aren’t seen outside much on rainy days, such as this one. And here I find you, inside your room on a rainy day.” Dorothea gestured towards Byleth, her voice just a bit too sweet to be oblivious.

“Don’t most people stay inside when it rains?”

“They certainly do, Professor, however most people who stay inside make it a point to at least eat something while they do. Can you say the same?” Her smile was sharp, perceptive.

Byleth winced internally, though she was fairly confident that her usual expressionless visage was still in place. It likely meant nothing to Dorothea whether she was obvious about her discomfort or not, Byleth felt like Dorothea knew all of the answers to the questions she was asking, but saw fit to ask them anyway.

“I’ll take your silence as a ‘no’ then. Professor, I know that you’re a little odd in many ways, but it’s obvious that you avoid the rain, which is stranger than your usual behavior.” Dorothea’s eyes softened then. “What troubles you, Professor? Perhaps I can help.”

So perhaps Byleth had been wrong about nobody noticing her avoidance of rain. The proof of that stood before her right in front of her door. She could turn Dorothea away, but the way that the songstress looked at Byleth stirred something in her unbeating heart.

Byleth _wanted_ to share her burden with Dorothea, but was it right?

“You’re my student, Dorothea…” _It would be improper,_ she left unsaid.

Dorothea laughed, though it was not unkind. “Professor, for the amount of students you’ve assisted with personal problems, I think we are well beyond the point of propriety.”

Byleth had nothing to say to that, so instead of verbally conceding the point, she stepped aside and held the door open wider for Dorothea. “Please sit wherever you like.”

“Thank you, Professor,” said Dorothea, giving a gentle squeeze to Byleth’s arm as she passed. The songstress took a seat at Byleth’s desk, turning the chair to face the bed, where Byleth herself sat. “Before you begin, I’d like to thank you for trusting me with whatever you choose to reveal. After everything you’ve done for me, I’d be quite the cad if I didn’t at least _try_ to return the favor.”

Byleth shook her head, lacing her fingers together. “I didn’t help you just so you could do something for me in turn.”

“And the same goes for me. I’m here because I _want_ to be, not because I have to be. If that were the case, you’d have the entire monastery lined up outside your door.”

“You’re exaggerating,” Byleth said, a foreign sensation burning in her cheeks.

Dorothea smiled. “Not in the slightest.”

Byleth looked at her hands, as if they would give her the answers she sought. “I’m not fond of the rain, or at least I’m not anymore.” At Dorothea’s nod, she continued. “I can’t say I ever really liked it, but now it just makes me feel… sad.”

She shook her head. “’Sad’ isn’t quite the right word for it, but I don’t know what else to call it. I’ve never really felt this way before.”

“If I may interject,” Dorothea said softly, “when did you start to feel the way that you do when it rains, Professor? Perhaps knowing that will help clear your feelings up.”

“It was after…” Byleth swallowed a large lump that had suddenly formed in her throat. She jumped when she felt a hand gently squeeze her knee.

“Take your time, Professor. There’s no rush,” Dorothea murmured, giving another gentle squeeze.

Byleth nodded by way of thanks. She took a deep breath. “It was after… my father died.”

Dorothea’s eyes widened. “It was raining that day, wasn’t it?”

“Yes. It was the first day I cried, and the first day I felt… whatever it is I am feeling now.” Byleth wrung her hands. “Now I feel the same way I did that day whenever it rains.”

“So you’ve been avoiding the rain to avoid that feeling,” Dorothea finished. “Professor, I’m so sorry. It’s so obvious now that you’ve said it. I feel like a fool for not realizing sooner.”

“You couldn’t have known, Dorothea. I am not very good at expressing emotions, and my feelings aren’t obvious in my speech, or so I’m told.”

“Even so! I pride myself on my ability to read people, and you are no exception, Professor. I had noticed something was off before, but I’d never thought to pursue it. I should have followed my instincts and spoken to you sooner.”

That familiar twinge returned, making Byleth grab at her shirt. Hearing Dorothea speak so passionately on her behalf felt… _nice_. It would be nice to hear her say nice things about Byleth more often.

She shook her head. Whatever twinge she was feeling in her chest was not important. She was focusing on her feelings when it rained.

As soon as she thought of it, that same twisting, swirling feeling returned to her chest as if summoned. “Do you know what it is I am feeling then?”

Dorothea blinked at the sudden return to their original subject, but said nothing about it. “Since I’m not you, I can only guess, but surely you are feeling ‘grief.’ It’s a feeling everyone experiences when they lose a loved one.”

Grief.

Byleth knew of fellow mercenaries who grieved their loved ones, or the rare ‘sentimental types’ –as her father had called them—who mourned slaughtered villages, but she had never truly understood it. Her mother had died long before Byleth could remember, so she had never truly mourned her, nor had she had anyone close to her die when she _could_ remember.

So it was grief that made her unbeating heart clench, made her feel even more hollow than she had felt before coming to Garreg Mach, made her stay inside when it rained.

It was grief that made her shed tears for the first time in her life.

“Grief…” Byleth stared at her hands.

“The rain must remind you of that day. It’s no wonder you avoid it,” Dorothea whispered, rising from her seat to settle next to Byleth. Hesitantly, she put an arm around her Professor’s shoulders, hoping that the gesture would provide some comfort, or even closure.

“I’ve never felt grief before, but it hurts… it hurts so much…”

Dorothea pulled Byleth into a tight hug, rubbing soothing circles into her back with one hand, and gently petting her hair with the other. “I know, Professor. It makes you feel like the world is hopeless, like nothing really matters, but despite the pain, it is important to let yourself grieve. It helps you to feel better and to process your thoughts and feelings. But grief is a hungry emotion, and if you allow it, it will consume you.”

She pulled Byleth in just a bit tighter. “So, if you feel yourself falling too deep, you need to talk to someone. Talking to someone is a way that many people process grief.” She pulled back just a bit to look Byleth in the eye, surprised to find tears slipping down her Professor’s face. She thumbed them away with a sad smile. “I hope you know that I am always happy to listen and to help in any way that I can. Know that you can always rely on me, Professor.”

“What am I supposed to talk about?” Byleth warbled, eyes closing as she felt Dorothea’s soft thumbs caress her cheeks. Her fingers were cool against the heat of Byleth’s skin.

Dorothea had to stop herself from giggling. The question was almost funny, but she knew that Byleth asked it in earnest, and would likely be hurt if Dorothea laughed. Instead, she smiled softly. “Whatever you like. Tell me about him, about memories with him, what you’re feeling, anything! I’m happy to listen.”

She could feel some of Byleth’s hair tickling her ear as she nodded. Her Professor seemed to bury herself in Dorothea’s shoulder, clinging tight to her as if she was drowning and Dorothea was a lifeline.

“He never said much,” Byleth started shakily, “but I never doubted that he cared about me. He’d always stick close to me on missions and make sure I was never alone with some of the worse men we had to travel with. He bought me a lot of different things when we arrived in towns, like stuffed animals and toys, no matter how little I reacted. I think he wanted to try and find something to make me happy.”

She sniffled. “I wish he had told me about my mother more. He’d sometimes mention her when we passed a flower field, or talk to her on the anniversary of her death, but he never even mentioned her name.”

Dorothea hummed to show she was listening, resuming her earlier ministrations. In truth, she wished she could give Jeralt a piece of her mind for not talking about Byleth’s mother more frequently, considering how much he supposedly loved the woman. But that wasn’t important right now.

“I wish he had told me more about her. It wouldn’t bring her back, but it would be nice to be able to feel somewhat close to her, especially now that he’s gone. I wonder sometimes if she liked fishing as much as he and I did, and if she would have liked to go on fishing trips with us. I wish she could tell me what he was like when they met, how she felt when she saw him for the first time.”

Byleth clung to Dorothea. “I miss him every day, but rainy days hurt the most.”

She sobbed, pushing her face further into the crook of Dorothea’s neck. “I miss him.”

“That’s right, Professor. Just let it all out,” Dorothea cooed. “You’ll feel a bit better once you do.”

The way Byleth rubbed her face into Dorothea’s shoulder suggested she nodded at her student’s words. Dorothea ran her fingers through the messy blue locks. “You know, I’ve never been fond of rain myself. Rainy days meant less people walking the streets, which meant less food and money to beg for.”

Byleth hummed brokenly, her voice cutting out for a brief second as she took comfort in Dorothea’s arms and words. Her warmth was a stark contrast to the chill that rain always seemed to bring.

“When it would rain for days on end, I’d see less and less of my fellow street rats. I can only assume what happened to them. The rain would soak right through whatever handouts we had, and would chill us to the bone. I remember during a rainstorm in the winter, we found an elderly woman frozen to death in an alley. It made us a lot more wary of the rain afterward.”

Dorothea coughed. “But this isn’t about me, Professor. This is about you, and your feelings. I thought that I might sympathize with you.”

“Thank you,” Byleth murmured. “What does sympathizing do for this situation?”

“It tells you that someone else is trying to understand you and your feelings and let you know that you aren’t alone in your grief.”

The thought of sharing her pain with another had never occurred to Byleth, but then again, she’d never had a reason to prior to the death of her father. Dorothea was opening up a new world for her.

“Thank you, Dorothea,” Byleth said, wiping her tears. “If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t have been able to feel better.”

Dorothea smiled so kindly it made something in her chest twinge again. “I’m happy to have been able to help, Professor. There will still be times where you feel sad and alone, but it’s entirely normal. Never hesitate to talk to me if you’re feeling down, or if you have questions about emotions in general. I’ll do my best to help.”

“In that case, I have another feeling I don’t know the name of,” Byleth said, her gaze returning to more of her normal impassive self.

“Ask away!”

“There’s this feeling I get in my chest sometimes, sort of like something is clenching.” Byleth put a hand to her chest, gripping at the fabric of her shirt. “It doesn’t happen very often, but it’s a really strong feeling when it does happen.”

Dorothea nodded. “Any specific times this happens?”

Byleth thought for a minute, staring off into space –Dorothea wouldn’t say that the expression was the same one as always, but it was close to it.

“Yeah, it happens a lot when I’m around you,” Byleth said, completely unaware of what such an admission would do to Dorothea’s poor unprepared heart.

“O-oh! Is that so?”

“Yes. It happens a lot when you smile, though it does it the most when you smile at me.” Byleth settled her soul-seeing gaze on Dorothea. “What do you think it means?”

“W-well—”

Dorothea was cut short when Byleth put a hand to her forehead. “Your face is quite red, Dorothea. Are you feeling alright? Should I take you to see Manuela?”

“No!” Dorothea coughed. “I mean, I’m alright Professor. Thank you for your concern.”

“If you’re sure…” Byleth said, slowly retracting her hand.

“I am _positive_. Besides, we are focusing on you, not me.”

“That’s true, but I don’t want you to put aside your own wellbeing for my sake. You’re important to me, Dorothea. I want to return the kindness you have shown me.”

“Geez, Professor, you’re quite the charmer when you want to be. Careful, or I might get the wrong idea.”

Byleth blinked. “What would the wrong idea be?”

“Professor, if I didn’t know any better, I would say you liked watching me squirm,” Dorothea said, her face red.

“I don’t understand.” Byleth tilted her head.

Dorothea sighed. “Professor, do you remember that conversation we had about you taking care of me when my beauty is gone and my voice isn’t praised?” At Byleth’s nod, she continued. “Saying things like that sounds like a proposal, which it wasn’t. Thinking that you were seriously proposing to me would be getting the wrong idea.”

“Dorothea, I think what I’m feeling now is stronger than my grief.”

The songstress was thrown by the non-sequitur. “What are you feeling?”

“I feel like marrying you would make me very happy. Something in my chest is squeezing at the thought of being with you.”

The expression on Dorothea’s face was something Byleth had never seen before. She looked happy, but embarrassed at the same time. Her cheeks were quite red too. “I think I know what that feeling is, Professor, but the question is, do you know?”

When Byleth did nothing but examine her face, Dorothea giggled. “I’m going to say something, and then you can tell me what feeling my words brought. Does that sound good?”

At Byleth’s nod, Dorothea took a deep breath and looked her Professor directly in the eye. “Byleth, I love you.”

To say that Byleth’s cheeks were red was an understatement. Dorothea had never seen Byleth’s cheeks color more than a bit of pink from the cold, or a rare moment of embarrassment. This was something else entirely.

“I—” Byleth was absolutely floored. Her mind was completely blank, save for Dorothea’s words on repeat. _She called me by my name…_

“Well, Professor? How do you feel?” Dorothea knew her own cheeks were just as red, and the pyre of hope kindling in her chest was growing stronger by the minute.

“Love…” Byleth honestly wondered if there was a limit to how oblivious she could be. She didn’t need to be a genius to know what love was, and yet somehow she couldn’t even put two and two together when the answer nearly slapped her in the face.

She took a breath and turned to face Dorothea directly. “Dorothea, I meant what I said back then, but the feeling is different now. I love you, and I would like to take care of you for the rest of your life, not as a guardian or your professor, but as your wife.”

“You’re moving a little fast, Professor. We haven’t even started courting yet and you’re already speaking of marriage?” Dorothea said with a teasing grin, but her flushed cheeks were just as bright.

“If you allow me to court you, I intend to treasure you through courting, marriage, and beyond.”

Dorothea’s cheeks somehow flushed further. “This had better not be a jest, Professor, though I don’t believe you’re the type to joke about such things.”

“You’re right, Dorothea, I would never jest about something like this. I say this in earnest; I love you.”

Dorothea coughed to try and regain a bit of composure. “Who would have thought I’d ever feel such joy on a rainy day?” She raised her hands slowly until they cupped Byleth’s cheeks. “Even for me, a serial romantic, marriage is a little fast, Byleth, but I would love to be yours if you would do me the honor of being mine.”

Byleth nuzzled into her love’s touch. “I accept wholeheartedly.”

Dorothea leaned forward until their foreheads were touching. “May I kiss you to celebrate?”

“I’d love nothing more.”

Hesitantly, as if Dorothea could not believe these events were coming to pass, she pressed her lips to Byleth’s, jolting a bit when Byleth tilted her head to deepen the kiss. Encouraged by the enthusiastic response, Dorothea brought one hand from Byleth’s cheek up into her hair, lightly scratching at her scalp. She smiled into the kiss as Byleth hummed at the sensation.

Far too quickly for Dorothea’s liking, they pulled apart, their foreheads still touching. “Goddess, I can hardly believe this is real. I’m so unbelievably happy right now.”

Before Byleth could respond, Dorothea pulled her back in, pressing Byleth back into the mattress. She leaned over her professor, her hands gliding across her love’s skin. “I love you,” she breathed before diving back in.

Feeling emboldened, she parted her lips to let her tongue glide across Byleth’s, who parted hers to let Dorothea’s tongue into her mouth. It was hot inside Byleth’s mouth, and she nearly groaned at the sensation. Every kiss she has had prior has paled in comparison to the kisses she shared with Byleth. Every kiss, every touch Byleth’s calloused fingers left along her skin, was perfect. The love they shared made everything perfect.

When they parted to breathe again, Byleth pulled Dorothea down on top of her, wrapping an arm around her waist and the other carding through her silky brown locks. “Do I still need to leave my room today?”

Dorothea giggled, the puffs of air tickling Byleth’s sternum. “You still need to eat… but I think we can wait a while.”

**Author's Note:**

> Miss Dorothea, my DMs are open. I'll take care of you for the rest of my life.
> 
> Anyway, hope y'all enjoyed. Until next time~!


End file.
